Adoption story - The Riley family

Adoption story - The Riley family

Peter Riley is the manager of a gallery in Salisbury and his wife Fiona is a music teacher. After two years of trying unsuccessfully for a baby they made their first contact with Hammersmith & Fulham Council.

We were encouraged to get started by some friends who had adopted and we were invited to attend Hammersmith & Fulham’s “Explaining Adoption” course, says Fiona. “The course was extremely inspiring as well as challenging – the social workers also used the time to learn about us and our suitability for adoption.”

Following the course they were invited to be assessed for adoption. Peter remembers how they were assessed: “The process was very thorough and fairly intensive – a social worker visited our house fortnightly for three months. We were extremely fortunate that we had a good rapport with our social worker. 

“There comes a crunch point when you have to decide what sort of child you are prepared to adopt. Many children needing adoption are no longer babies and some have disabilities, health problems or difficult backgrounds. You have to be very honest with yourself.”

The Rileys were prepared to take on a child with a mild disability and were keen to adopt a baby, but the reality was that this would be very difficult. Fiona explains:

“Most authorities or agencies only take on a couple of white families for baby adoption because they want families with a range of ethnic backgrounds to match the children looking for homes or white adopters for older children.”

When they were given the green light to adopt they were delighted with the news.

“Adoption is like a rollercoaster ride with lots of highs and lows. We were over the moon that we’d become approved adopters, but finding a child to match your profile is probably the most difficult part”

A year and a half later, after a couple of disappointments, the Rileys were matched with a five month old girl called Georgia. Fiona remembers their introduction:

“A couple of days before we met her, Georgia’s foster carer put some photos through the door so we could see what she looked like. We then had a week of contact time with our new daughter, where she gradually spent more and more time with us in our home. It was a time of great celebration, exhaustion, joy, tears and apprehension.”

Georgia happily settled with her new parents but it was two years before she was legally adopted. Like all adopted children, she as appointed a guardian who investigated her background and prepared a case or the adoption judge. Thanks to the guardian’s hard work, the Rileys met Georgia’s mother and they now have a fuller picture of her circumstances which will be important to her in later years. As Peter says, “Adopted children always have a history of their own that has to be recognised and accepted. This makes for a healthy relationships.”

Immediately after formally adopting their eldest daughter, the Rileys began the application process all over again and are now completing the legal adoption of their second child. Georgia is delighted with her little sister and both girls have “life books” and photos or their birth families.

So despite all the ups and downs of adoption, would the Rileys recommend it?

“The girls make us feel complete,” says Fiona “We never dreamt that we would have such wonderful children.”

“Go for it – and get started early,” says Peter, “It’s a long haul but definitely worth it. We feel completely blessed and we wouldn’t have it any other way.”